Maxim # 14, December 1998

<b>FEATURES</b><br> 92 SEASON&#39;S BEATINGS<br>
THE SAVE-YOUR-ASS GIFT GUIDE<br>
You&#39;ve got a posse to please during the holidays: your boss, girlfriend, mother-in-law,
three-year-old nephew. Our guide will save loads of time... maybe even protect
you from bodily harm.<br>
106 BOOKS THAT DON&#39;T BORE<br>
BUSTED IN BANGKOK<br>
This excerpt from Warren Fellows&#39; 4,000 Days provides a horri fying taste of his 11 1/2-year stay in a Thai prison. Those with rat phobias should steer clear.<br>
114 COVER GIRL<br>
YASMINE BLEETH<br>
The former Baywatch goddess has a new job: riding Don Johnson&#39;s sorry ass as a hard-core internal affairs cop on Nash Bridges. Let the interrogation commence!<br>
120 ADVANCED ANTHROPOLOGY<br>
MEN ARE PIGS<br>
Of course, given our behavior, we&#39;re also rats, chickens, elephants...even brindled
gnus. Here&#39;s the evidence.<br>
124 TRAVEL IMPROVES THE MIND<br>
WHERE ARE ALL THE WOMEN?<br>
Anyone can find a halfway decent beach, ski resort, or island. We tell you how
to find the ones populated by beautiful women who would love to meet you.<br>
132 GET DRESSED<br>
THE POWER HOUR<br>
Watches to wear whether you&#39;re ticking down -mar— the secs at a formal New
Year&#39;s bash or just lying on the couch, wondering how long till Hogan&#39;s Heroes<br>
138 CAREER COUNSELING<br>
ODD JOBS<br>
A sex carpenter, a blood maid, a garbage diver, and a man who draws people&#39;s asses prove you don&#39;t have to attend law school to make an honest buck.<br>
148 HEAVEN<br>
SCREEN SAVERS<br>
When your TV show is in a Nielsen free fall, who you gonna call? These curvaceous guest stars, who make heart rates and ratings rise<br>
154 STYLE<br>
THE WILD LIFE<br>
Sophisticated without being stiff, these suits look great whether you&#39;re holiday-partying
all night or illegally chopping down Christmas trees deep in the forest.<br>
<b>COLUMNS</b><br>
72 SAYS HER<br>
THE F*#@ING HOLIDAYS<br>
Winter blues got you ready to roast your nuts on an open fire? Well, get ready
to bust out your yule log: Nancy Miller explains why women get the holiday hots.<br>
76 BUCKS<br>
HOW MUCH YOU GOT IN YOUR POCKET?<br>
More than a thousand readers tell us what&#39;s in their wallets nd where it goes.<br>
LIDONE THAT 82 DRAFT DODGER Ever dream of trying out for the pros, just to see
how far you&#39;d get? High on hopes but low on talent, average yutz Jake Bronstein throws his cap into the NBA<br>
88 GRIND<br>
HOW TO LIE ON YOUR RESUMÉ<br>
We&#39;re not saying you should fib about your achievements ("Mr. Williams, I&#39;m impressed. Did you really invent baseball?"). We&#39;re just... um .., showing you how other people do it...and get away with it.<br>
162 WINE & DINE<br>
GET BAKED!<br>
Those standard-issue stocking-shaped Christmas cookies are for soccer moms. Here
are some cutting-edge cutters that&#39;ll give your holiday baked goods a twisted edge. We provide the recipes; you provide the red food dye.<br>
166 STUFF<br>
SNOW JOB<br>
A ski-run-destroying snowmobile, winter sports to trash your new machine, and
a fort full of snow J gear that makes us feel all warm and toasty inside<br>
<b>DEPARTMENTS</b><br>
36 CIRCUS MAXIMUS<br>
How to fake a royal lineage, eat sushi off a naked virgin, and get rosy-cheeked
Christmas carolers off your damned front lawn without the use of semiautomatic
weapons<br>
170 HANG TIME<br>
Our cut-through-the-crap guide to the latest movies, music, television, and books<br>
184 INSERT CAPTION HERE<br>
A contest for the sick and twisted