Maxim # 26, February 2000

<b>FEATURES</b><br>
64 WE WANT ANSWERS!<br>
DENNIS HOPPER<br>
The real rebel without a cause gives it up on orgies, opium, and Natalie Wood
in a tub of champagne.<br>
66 BUTTER HER UP!<br>
CRAZY STUFF WOMEN LOVE<br>
Yeah, girls like flowers. But if you really want to turn her on, crash your car
into her living room or invite her over to feed your piranhas. Hey, it worked
for us.<br>
72 BULLSHIT DEFLECTORS<br>
TAKE NO CRAP FROM ANYONE!<br>
Tired of being harassed by your mom, your coworkers, your girlfriend? Read our
guide to showing them who&#39;s boss.<br>
78 PSYCHO SURGERY<br>
THE BUTCHER OF SOUTH BEACH<br>
When Alexander Baez awoke, he found himself strapped to a table and zonked on
dog tranquilizers, with quack surgeon Reinaldo Silvestre digging into his chest
with a spatula. Grab the Maalox: We&#39;re heading for the operating room.<br>
88 FINE ARTS<br>
ATTACK OF THE KILLER B&#39;S!<br>
Chain-saw freaks, sexy Frankenhookers, flying innards. Maxim takes you to the
50 greatest B movies of all time.<br>
96 THONG! THONG! THONG!<br>
THE REAL SWIMSUIT ISSUE<br>
Top models. Tiny bikinis. And none of that annoying sports filler. Just 38 smoking pages of the planet&#39;s sexiest women. Dive in!<br>
<b>REGULARS</b><br>
18 LETTERS<br>
Rosy crucifixions, bodies smeared with creamy peanut butter, and what one reader&#39;s girlfriend did to get into the pages of Maxim. (Hey, lady, put your shirt back on!)<br>
22 JOKES<br>
Who can sit around and crack &#39;em when there&#39;s so much damn work to do? We can.<br>
24 CIRCUS MAXIMUS<br>
Our intrepid reporters uncover the shocking truth about yo mama, penis-cloning
kits, Yiddish workout videos, ball-grabbing Brits, and the world&#39;s largest breasts.
Plus: going ape at the Valentine&#39;s Day Zoo Sex Tour, and a free airplane for every reader! Now, that&#39;s journalism.<br>
44 HOW TO<br>
Shoot on net with Eric Lindros, survive a nasty avalanche, score an instant-chill pill, and pick up a woman while cruising on horseback. Because, hey, you never know...<br>
50 SAYS HER<br>
DON&#39;T TRY THIS AT HOME<br>
We asked a bunch of ladies to watch some porn, take notes, and get back to us.
Here&#39;s what they liked, what they didn&#39;t like, and what they&#39;d rather have you do to them instead.<br>
54 SPORTS<br>
SWAPPING PAINT<br>
What&#39;s it like driving 200 mph with Dale Earnhardt on your ass, then flipping end over end 25 times? NASCAR champ Rusty Wallace takes us for a spin.<br>
60 BUCKS<br>
THE MAXIM MUTUAL FUND<br>
How can you make a cool million while drinking cold beer, watching ball games
on TV, gambling, and getting your girlfriend off? By buying the best guy-friendly stocks for 2000. Our adviser picks &#39;em.<br>
139 FASHION<br>
Cuban duds so hip you&#39;ll spend all your dinero, spring clothes that&#39;ll make her pretty little flower blossom, and shoes that rule the earth.<br>
159 GRINDER<br>
Which pair of jeans can tow an eight-cylinder toickup? Which watch can survive
a tumble off the top of the Maxim building? Which love wax goes the distance?
We tested this stuff and survived. Plus: the Who&#39;s BBC sessions, Scream 3, and the maddest futuristic video games in the universe.<br>
176 BEAT THIS CAPTION<br>
Are you as sick and demented as we are? Prove it!